I don’t want to be a social media influencer

I don’t want to be a social media influencer.

I’ve heard myself say those words too often recently for me not to respect my truth. But it’s true. Even saying “content creator” still feels weird to me, though I suppose that’s one of the professional categories I once would fall under.

I never set out to be any of that. I stumbled my way into the World Wide Web as a pre-teen, and turns out, I’m a hell of a spider. Over the years, my personal web has grown to massive proportions. I’m of the generation of teenage internet users who answered strangers in the dial-up chat rooms with the answer to the question: “A/S/L?”

And I’ve been using this as a means of communication and connection ever since. I’ve Lived Journaled, MySpace coded, top 10 friend organized, AOL away message curated, blog-spotted, and was the guinea pig of a generation sharing their life stories on Facebook through “Like pages.”

Insert Skinny Jeans Dreams and the journey that followed. [More on that story here].

But back then, being a “social media influencer” wasn’t what it is today. These days, you can pay $199 to take a downloadable course on how to become a social media influencer with brand kits, ChatGPT captions, and half-baked stories. We’ve got kid influencers promoting skincare routines most adults can’t afford, families exploiting their kids who don’t know any better but have millions of views, and in 2025, A.I. influencers with perfect breasts and squeaky voices.

In my mind - influence is a responsibility.

But the concept of what influence means has been watered down and packaged in a slimy bow . There is nothing in me that wants to play the same game that it once was. I don’t want to partake in an A.I. universe, and if that makes me an old dog who won’t be able to keep up, then so be it. Woof.

So ……what then?

Writing has always been my north star. It is what I fall back on when I don’t know what to do next, and it’s the vehicle that has carried me through many changes in my professional life. Along the way, I’ve picked up a wide skill set, which I’ve used to help elevate the voices, brands, and visions of others.

Through my years, I’ve helped countless businesses with these same skills, from journalistic contributions to newsmagazines to ghostwriting for corporate clients. I’ve created email campaigns, press releases, managed social media, developed marketing strategies, and written website copy for clients across at least a dozen industries.

I’ve written listicles for wedding companies and obituaries for grieving families; magazine copy for fashion companies and short stories for collections; captions for YouTube videos and blogs for real estate investors. (Several published on Forbes). I’ve written campaign marketing material, curated team trainings, and even a love story from a husband to his wife, one Christmas.

Along the way, I held onto the idea of needing to maintain a personal brand. Once Skinny Jeans Dreams felt like it didn’t align with who I was becoming, I began the journey of rebranding. The never-ending-journey……. Of rebranding…..on social media.

The answering of the question - how do I want the world to see me?

What message do I want to put out? Who do I want to be? What is my purpose? What is my why? Who is my target audience? What is the recent trend? Are we still using hashtags? Am I getting too personal? Am I being personal enough? Can anyone even hear me? And the main question - what is the f*cking point?

15 years since the launch of Skinny Jeans Dreams and many twists and turns later, and I am faced yet again with - the biggest question of them all - “So what are ya gonna do then, Krystle?”

Well - if you read my first book Nourish, you’ll know that making multi-option decisions isn’t my strong suit. I like to work backwards and rely on the law of opposites to chisel away at things until I can see clearly what it is that I do want. With a big imagination like this one, I can cast 50 possibilities in one breath…… after some time and energy consulting my higher council, I usually find myself amazed when I get to the answer - like “duh, that’s the one you knew you’d pick all along.”

You discover things about yourself as life’s journey passes by. Retrospect affords you the opportunity to observe cycles and understand how your inner system operates. Knowing this, I skip all the “shame” that comes with the time-wasting inner dialogue whispering about why I don’t have it figured out by now and get straight to the point.

I say it firmly to myself: “Alright, Krystle - what do you not want?”

What colors are we not using in this painting?

What threads no longer fit this web?

What energies have to be saged out before I can create?

And so the journey of self-curiosity continues. But I’ve been taking notes… so I know that the answer has always been: I want to write. And in this season - I don’t want it to involve algorithm fighting or personal brand discussions. I just want to write the things living in my heart.

I’ve gotten lost in the sauce of the times of being a “personal brand.” I’ve been the influencer… the content creator…the affiliate marketer… the journalist, the radio host, and the podcast creator.

But what I’m good at is being the storyteller, the writer, and the author. I know that I can not let this dance with life come to a close without writing the books that live inside of me. I am exploring a very new and exciting season of motherhood that is demanding my undivided attention and also my best self.

There is an unspoken accountability that comes with having a young man and woman staring back at you. I still want to make them proud, and I still have a lot to give that doesn’t involve sharing my breakfast with for a few likes on Instagram.

I recently deactivated my Facebook account of almost 20 years & my Instagram is honestly dry as a hole in the wall. But what I want to do with my time, when my back is against the wall, is WRITE.

I want to write & I want to gather.

Those are the answers to the question that I’ve answered in 100 different ways on 100 different days - “if money didn’t matter, what would you do with your time?”

I would write.

And I would gather.

I am thankful to finally be feeling more like myself since our May car accident. It’s been a rollercoaster of a recovery journey, including limited screen time and lots of naps. I’ve spent a ton of my waking time in my notebooks bringing these book concepts to fruition, and I intend to keep my energy focused there.

I can not ignore what is going on in the world and in our country. The hate and division are higher than ever before. I am continuously looking for my way through it - how do I serve? What do I do with my hands? How do I maintain my peace while staying informed? There is a laundry list of emotions that I feel on any day, which is why I can’t bring myself to partake in too much on Instagram or Facebook, as they are not the place for critical thinkers and deep-sea feelers right now.

But my real writing is happening in those notebooks.

Some of which I will be sharing here for paid subscribers.

As a protection to myself, my energy, and my intellectual property, I’ve decided that my true writing and personal story can not live willy-nilly on the internet any longer. My best work, including my poetry, in-person meet-ups, deeper thoughts, and conversations with the community, will be reserved for paid subscribers.

I know money is tight right now for many people. If you CAN afford the few $ a month to join this private, safe, and vetted community, it serves as a “tip” for me and also a barrier of entry so we can create online safe places.

If for some reason you can’t, but you know you need this community, please contact me directly at krystlejbailey@gmail.com.

I will be sharing more thoughts soon. As I rework the clay and find my rhythm with a few things I’m thinking about, I am available for freelance work for all aforementioned services.

xo Krystle